9 Things to Think About With a Mower in Your Hands

We can thank 17th century European aristocrats for our weekly lawn mowing chores. Before the invention of the lawn mower in 1830 only wealthy people could afford the army of scythe-wielding gardeners it took to manicure a purely ornamental lawn. Anyone else lucky enough to have land used it for more practical things, like growing vegetables or grazing cows.

By 1870 a decent push mower had been invented, which meant people with a lot of time on their hands could have the same plush green that surrounded wealthy estates. But it wasn’t until after World War II when Americans started living in tidy little suburban homes that common folk became truly obsessed with grooming the perfect yard.

Now that spring and grass growing season here, Patch takes a closer look at that green oasis around your home.

That’s a lot of green. NASA researchers estimate that that Americans grow three times more grass than any other irrigated crop (like corn or wheat). They have mapped our lawns from space and have calculated we have about 49,421 square miles of lawn in the US. That’s about the size of Iowa.

The grass is always greener in the non-dog lover’s yard. Dogs need a nice big yard to run around in, but unfortunately they can leave yellow patches where they relieve themselves. PetSmart can solve that problem with doggie supplements that lower the pH level of your dog’s urine, preventing the grass from getting burned.

Paint it green. Anyone can have a green thumb—if they use paint. A company in Nevada, where grass is rather difficult to grow, sells lawn paint. The product can be sprayed on dead grass to permanently dye it a perfect green. Paint a dead spot or paint the whole lawn. Instant green!

Grow native. Most plants used for lawns are not native to Missouri—or most of the U.S. for that matter. Rather than fight Mother Nature, work with her when selecting plants for your lawn. MoDot and private businesses have discovered that planting native prairie grasses and wildflowers saves money on watering and maintenance—which is why we’ve seen an explosion of “prairie recover area” signs along the highway. Check out the Missouri Department of Conservation for more information on their program, “Grow Native!”

Rip it up. Fed up with the high water bills and time spent mowing that go hand-in-hand with lawn maintenance? Get rid of your grass and go synthetic. SYNLawn (the sister company of AstroTurf) will be happy to replace your organic lawn with a carpet of high tech “grass”. There’s over 25 varieties to choose from, with options for yards, dog owners and playgrounds.

Mower for hire. If you don’t want to spend your whole weekend pushing a mower but you’re not quite ready to tear up your lawn either, think about hiring a lawn care service. in Fenton can send out a crew to tend to your lawn while you’re away at work. Mowing and trimming a typical suburban yard is about $26 a week, other services are extra. They can do everything from aerating the lawn, spreading fertilizer and trimming your shrubs. All you have to do is enjoy.

Perking up yards since 1957. The pink flamingo yard decoration was invented by Don Featherstone back in the days of big Cadillacs and hula hoops. Since then they’ve gone in and out of style many times, but if you want to add a little quirkiness to your yard they’re still around. can set you up with a pink feathered friend, with either traditional wire legs or realistic ones.

21st Century flamingo. If pink isn’t your thing, is currently selling a modern take on the plastic flamingo yard ornament—it’s metallic and teal and oh-so-2012.

Own your own Gnomeo. Believe it or not, ceramic gnomes have been tending to gardens and lawns since their invention in the 1870’s by German potter Philipp Griebel. You can pick up a few pint sized gnomes at , or more traditional ones at Just watch out for the Gnome Liberation Front, who don’t believe in gnome captivity.